


Escapism

by Penstrokes



Series: Self indulgency [1]
Category: Super Science Friends
Genre: Animorphs AU, Existential Crisis, Gen, Girls' Night Out, I wanted to die, Jung's only in this for a little bit, almost 5K words, at least she gets to dance and try her first alcoholic drink, identity crisis, it's mostly Extroberta centric, this is fucking 12 pages long
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-13 18:56:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16023950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Penstrokes/pseuds/Penstrokes
Summary: When Extroberta gets the chance to try out her human morph, she expects to have a fun night out as herself.What she doesn't expect is a forceful examination of her state of existence.





	Escapism

**Author's Note:**

> Timeline A: The SSF, Jung, Edison and Ford are dragged into the late 90’s in California to fight the war between The Ellimist and Crayak for a second time. No one has powers, but Jung still has The Berts

Adjusting to this new life was a strain on  Carl Jung.

Jumping through time was now a very normal phenomenon, almost a common basis occurrence for the most part. The jarring aspect of this little time travel adventure of theirs was that they hadn’t done it by choice. No, rather they had been pulled to an entirely new timeline and into a wholly new war.

 

This time, it wasn’t simply country against country nor  a world against itself. It was a more secret war from beyond the stars. Jung’s excitement at the news that aliens were in fact real, were quickly dampened by the nature of what it was that they did and what they intended to do. Enslavement of all sentient life in existence, destruction of all but what was necessary for their hosts.

  


The Ellimist had not been very kind to them, keeping whatever details Churchill and the rest of the super science friends had demanded of him a secret. Jung questioned his purpose on being ripped from his timeline and into this one, along with the super science friends. Being an enemy of Freud’s and by extension, the rest of the team, it made little sense for him to be there.

  


The one nice thing The Ellimist had done was alter things enough that their being in the ‘present’ wouldn’t be too disruptive. Between the secret alien invasion and still having to balance their team dynamics between form super science friends and fiends, it was the literal least he could have done.

 

It was still better than nothing. He flopped down on the sofa, closing his eyes. He hadn’t really fought in any of the new battles the Super Science Friends were fighting. No, his fight was with Freud and Freud alone. Aside from that, he’d opted to stay neutral, still unsure if he’d help the others in anyway or just try to ride out the Yeerk war going on in the background of the world.

 

The idea of a secret war was another thing that kept him on edge. The knowledge that any one of his patients, any person outside of the SSF were secretly one of them, accessing his usefulness certainly kept him from relaxing. He wished he could try dream walking, to see if he could find a solution to that little problem. If only it hadn’t been taken away in exchange for the morphing power. He knew for a fact that he still held his Berts on hand and that they could still switch freely between the three of them. It was comforting to know that even if he did become a controller, he’d have them in there with him.

 

Was he against the atrocities that the Yeerks were doing? Of course. He wasn’t sure if he was willing to risk his life, his sanity and his soul to the cause just yet. Introbert wanted to help run intelligence, spying through various animal forms as a sign of temporary truce between them and the friends.  Extroberta wanted to fight. Jung could feel that passionate desire to do acting up once more. Usually, it was something he’d accepted as a core part of who she was. Now, he was worried about what it could become.

 

His mind was exhausted, a deep want to simply be alone and not do anything overcame him. The want to be inert and unthinking, to simply be.  Jung didn’t want to think of the whats and what nots, the debating welling up inside of him among himself about the comforting idea of staying neutral  as the Swiss were known to do, or to take action in even the slightest bit.

  


Even without this three way debate raging inside his head, there was so much to do. Unfortunately for him,  it was not yet the weekend. He could, however, be afforded a way to escape and recoop himself.

 

 _Extroberta, would you like to come out and take over?_ Jung asked silently, letting his body go lax and his mind still. He could see in his mind’s eye the little world that the Berts resided in.

 

He could feel her grin from inside his mind. Faux movement as if she had gotten up from her little table she shared with her more withdrawn counterpart, Introbert.

 

 _You know I’d love to._ She responded eagerly.

 

Jung let himself fall out of control of his body and faded into the peaceful oblivion that was simply not thinking.

 

Extroberta felt herself come into control as the sensations of the real world came into focus for her. She breathed deeply with Jung’s lungs, standing up. She needn’t worry about him being concerned about what she did. They’d done this enough times that they could easily trust one another to not mess up….too badly.

 

There was so much to do, not only as part of their nightly routine, but as part of the ever growing list of things she wanted to experience before the three of them were done in the land of the living. Extroberta considered herself to be at a gross disadvantage as anyone considering her situation would think. Having been born into a world behind a mental and physical barrier to a body, whom despite still having at least a decade before officially being middle aged, was not running with a full ‘clock’ for her to experience with.

 

Sighing happily, Berta let herself dance across their neat apartment living room. Chores, although mundane, were a good warm up to what mischievous plan she’d had picked out. As long as she got what Carl had requested of her, she was free to do as she liked. It’d been a long standing rule between the three of them since the day all three of them discovered possessing his body was a thing they could do. Berta felt guilty, perhaps for a moment, before she set off.

 

What Jung didn’t know couldn’t hurt him was what she’d always say to Introbert. She fished around in his closet, buried behind other clothes, namely jackets and a few suits. Clothes he didn’t want getting wrinkly. It was a pretty and versatile little dress she had bought for herself a few weeks before when she’d had borrowed their shared body. Extroberta decided she deserved at least a few nice things she could call hers and hers alone. Although Jung had never said no to her having things herself in the real world, she’d hesitated to tell him about this little purchase. Somehow, it felt so much more private and almost intimate. A more outward and prominent display of ownership and self expression. At last, Extroberta would wear it for the first time and she would get to experience one of the things she’d always wanted to do more than anything in the world.

 

She would make sure to bring a watch, too.

 

It was funny, staring at Jung’s body in the mirror, almost curious. She had never really taken the time to study his face, it’d simply been a given to them. The slight bags under his eyes, the wrinkles starting to make themselves home on this forehead. The slicked back dark brown, almost black hair. That thin moustache. It was almost staggering to think that behind those eyes and in that skull of his lay two beings wouldn’t see the light of day on their own right. That the world would never know of Introbert and Extroberta, as _real_ people. That when Jung finally died, they would die as well, never having left a mark on this great wide world before them.

 

Extroberta could feel her throat closing up-no...it was Jung’s throat. She gave herself a sad but hopeful smile in the mirror. A smile that was Jung’s but in it’s own way also hers.  For the next two hours, she could change that. She’d been discrete about it, after learning about the Frolis Maneuver from the super science friends. Darwin had been the one to discover the little morphing trick. Being well versed in biology, he’d played around with it the most. It had taken weeks of experimentation to discover the little trick and even more weeks on top of that to teach it to the others. Acquiring the ladies she’d like wasn’t the hard part, she had several of the people that saw Jung weekly to choose from. It was so easy, to step in briefly, to hold their hand for a few seconds longer as he led them to his door.

 

She was going to get to test it, she was going to see _her._

 

She felt the changes begin as she shrank by a few inches, the grinding of bones, the dulled sensation almost broke her concentration.

 

No. She needed this.

 

There were not many changes she had to go through, for which she was grateful. The sculpting of Jung’s body into her new form, the disappearance of certain organs and the reappearance of others forced her to concentrate harder.As her eyesight changed, she took off his glasses, no longer needing them. She watched the final piece of the morph, the sight of Jung’s neat, plain hair giving way to bouncy brown curls and waves made her smile the widest.

 

Finally, she starred in the mirror truly satisfied. Gone was the almost forty year old Swiss man. In his place stood a young and delightful American woman. Roughly, she was what Extroberta wished the world could see her as.

 

Ready to take on the world, and that she was.

 

Changing into her new dress, Extroberta headed out the door and onto a bus. Where she was going? The sky was the limit.

 

Technically the road was the limit but the sentiment still stood for her. There were only two restrictions...well perhaps three depending on where she went.The bus was crowded and it smelled of gasoline and cigarette smoke, but she didn’t mind too much. She was far too captivated by the bright, flashing lights of all sorts of colors before her eyes. People walking around and living for just that night, just like her. The knowledge that she was so very very close to joining them and being like a real person was almost painful for her.

 

Keeping an eye on the watch she’d brought along, she got off at the nearest place that looked interesting. If she wanted to make the most of her two hour limit, she’d better pick somewhere close.

 

As she got off the bus, she breathed in the night air. It was still warm but less humid than it had been that day. The smell of various foods, passing vehicles and just the smell of people passed by her nose. The dance hall she entered seemed lively, with couples dancing on the floors and individuals intermingling. Thank god that she hadn’t needed to go through an ID check. Extroberta hadn’t thought at all until she’d approached the door. The music from the speakers was unlike any she’d heard before. Then again, there was a lot in the 1990’s that was almost headache inducingly different from 1914. For starters, it felt incredibly easy to just talk to someone, even someone of the other gender.

 

Putting on her best smile, she turned to a very nice looking man in a brown coat. He was young, in his mid twenties. At most maybe his early thirties.

 

“Hey cutie, you out here by yourself tonight?” She asked, quirking her eyebrow playfully.

 

The man gave her a look over, he smelled nice. There was a faint musk about him but not unpleasantly so.

 

“You?” He asked back, giving her his full attention.

  
This. She liked this. It felt natural and real. It felt like all the pieces were falling together and the shackles were finally off.

 

“I’m free as a bird tonight but I’m looking for someone to have some fun with. Are you up for it?” She told him, standing confidently.

 

“You seem awfully full of flirty energy tonight. Alright. I like it. What’s your name?” The man asked, leaning against the wall. Those sparkling brown eyes of his, the alluring smile- Extroberta had never felt her heart beat so hard. He was talking to _her._ She was seeing _her_ and all his words were meant for her and her alone.

 

“I’m Berta, I’m new to town. How about you?” She inquired, moving a little closer.

 

“Berta, huh? Isn’t that a little old fashioned?” He frowned slightly. Extroberta’s heart dropped at the comment. She supposed that it would be old in this day and age. Still, she’d always gone with it, the closest extension to her real name that she could get.

 

His answer changed once he saw Extroberta’s reaction. She hadn’t meant to let her emotions give her away, but she didn’t exactly have a lot of experience with facial expressions in the real world.

 

“Hey, don’t be so down. I think it’s pretty different.” He commented. “I’m Hector.”

 

Pretty different. _That’s a way of putting it_ , she thought to herself. She must have still been pouting because he immediately offered to dance with her.

 

It certainly snapped her out of her thoughts of whether or not he was still calling her _old._ Granted, she was technically very much so, she still didn’t appreciate being called such. Not when she’d barely had the chance to live.

 

“Maybe your dancing can make up for it.” She purred, batting her eyes flirtatiously at him. She was willing to give him another chance. He was cute after all.

 

 _Extroberta, what are you doing?_ Wafted up the concerned thought from Introbert.

 

 _I’m having a good time._ She answered, avoiding the truth. She knew he’d respect her privacy and she was grateful for it.

 

So why did she feel a little guilty over what she was doing?

 

Was it because she knew he might get worried and try to talk her out of it? Perhaps he’d be more supportive than she’d thought. Extroberta had never really tried to hide the fact that she thought a lot about what Introbert thought or said. Not to such a degree she’d let it stop her from doing or saying what she wanted, or from being herself. She valued their friendship, the deepness in it.

 

The chance it could be deeper still.

 

Extroberta pushed those thoughts aside, throwing herself further into the dance.

 

“Sorry, I got lost in thought there.” She explained to Hector’s concerned face. He was certainly a perceptive fellow.

 

“No need to think, it’s time to just cut back and relax, honey. Isn’t that why we’re here in the first place?” There was chatting and laughter all around her from her fellow dance hall goers. Guys and Gals jiving to the beat, hips swaying and arms flailing. Jumping, laughing. Letting the tune live through them.

  


“Yeah, you’re right. We have all the time in the world to think, but the time for doing is _now.”_ She answered energetically. Grabbing her partner’s hand she dragged him out onto the dance floor and away from the sidelines where they’d been earlier. Oh it felt nice to hold another person’s hand.

 

“So, Hector, what do you do when you’re not sweeping ladies off their feet and tearing up the dance floor?” Extroberta had become aware of how out dated her-and Jung’s- dancing undoubtedly were compared to everyone else's. She was watching the other people, trying to pick up what they were doing to better fit in.

 

“I like taking my bike out for rides around the city. My dad doesn’t like me riding my motorbike around but hey, he wasn’t about to get me a car. What about you, sweet cheeks?” He hadn’t let go of her hand since she’d taken it, which she taken as a good sign. They’d grown physically closer during the song and now that another was starting, who knew where this night would go?

 

In the next….how long did Extroberta have left anyhow? There was no way it’d already been two hours. She _should_ check but it’d rip her out of the here and now, remind her of her place in the universe. She had an hour and a half at least, she had to have, right?

 

Remind her she wasn’t fully real.

 

“You could say I work with a psychologist. He’s a real swell guy.” Extroberta answered warmly with genuine pride.  

 

“Psychology?” Hector repeated confusingly. “You’re into that mumbo jumbo?”

 

“Oh it’s so much more than ‘mumbo jumbo’, it’s a both a science and an art. A search and understanding of the inner workings of the mind. The very core of who someone is and why they do what they do.” She explained passionately, her free hand gesticulating as if to better convey the deepness to the field that could be easily overlooked or poorly understood. Hector simply smiled but his face told her that he wasn’t all that interested in what she had to say.

 

“Was that why you majored in it? You make it sound so artistic.” He commented, somewhere between feigning interest and being actually half interested.

 

“You could say that it was kind of in my soul. It called out to me, like it was destiny.” She winked, twirling lightly.

 

She no doubt had Carl to thank for this inevitability. It was inevitable because of what she was, it was always an essence of who she was. Her being brought into existence, name and all was never guaranteed. Her being under someone’s tutelage always was, however. Whether it was always bound to be Carl who gave them names and voices or another, their state of being was destined to stay the same.

 

“You’re some gal, Berta. Pretty and artsy. A little bit strange-not in a bad way. After this song is over, how’d you like to grab a drink or two? I’ll pay.” He offered casually.

 

“I’d love that.” She laughed lightly, living up the experience. She glanced at her wrist watch out of necessity, defying the growing thought that bubbled in the back of her mind. It was a guilty thought but it was a thought she wanted in earnest.

 

She still had about an hour,  there was still time and she clung to that as much as she could.

  


Alcohol had never been a thing Extroberta had experienced directly. Jung didn’t drink for personal reasons and thus neither had the berts. When Extroberta had had the chance before, she’d respected Jung’s wishes and refrained from doing so as well. She was borrowing his body and the very least she could do was to abide by his house rules.

 

This wasn’t his body anymore, so long as she didn’t get too tipsy and kept track of time, she’d be fine.

 

“So, what will you have?” Hector asked, as he sat down next to her at the bar.

 

A shy reluctant smile crossed her face as she admitted she’d never tasted alcohol before.

 

“You got a drink you want to try in mind ?” He asked, looking for a solution.

“No, sorry. I uh, don’t go partying out too much.” She explained.

 

“I’ll have a beer and a strawberry lemonade vodka for the lady.” He ordered, slapping down a twenty dollar bill on the counter ahead of time.

 

“Do you come here often?” She asked, resting one leg on top of the other as she leaned on her elbow, gazing at him.

 

“Here? In particular? No, but I’ve had drinks before. It’s my favorite weekend activity aside from riding my bike.” Was he sitting a  little closer to her now or was she imagining it? She didn’t mind, the closeness. She relished it.

 

“I really need to get out more. I’d love to explore this town more when I get the chance.” Their drinks had arrived and Extroberta looked at the color of her drink. It was a pretty pink color that she found charming. It smelled fruity with faintly sharp smell of alcohol behind it mixed in. Her first taste was not unlike how it smelled. With the sweet taste of the fruit doing it’s best to dull and mask the bitterness of the vodka.

 

“So, where were you from before you moved to California?” Hector took a swig from his beer glass before turning to her.

 

“Switzerland, actually.” She informed him with a smirk on her face. It was a lot more convenient than trying to explain _where_ in Switzerland she was from.

 

“Switzerland, huh? You don’t sound foreign.” He commented, taking another drink.

 

“What exactly do you mean by that?” She asked, wrinkling her nose in annoyance.

 

“You don’t have an accent, not a European one anyway. If I had to say it sounds more American, maybe English. Didn’t mean to offend.”

 

“Oh. Well, people speak a lot of languages in Europe, Switzerland included.” Her face was starting to feel warmer now, a little more relaxed.

Another glance at her watch, 45 minutes left if she factored in the bus ride.

 

Of course, she had to.

 

“So, that means you’re bilingual at least? I can speak a little spanish, stuff from high school. Can’t say I’m fluent enough to make use of it though.” Hector scoffed into his cup.

 

“What a waste of four years but at least I’m done with it.”

 

“I’m fluent in German as well as English. Maybe someday I’ll take up French.” She replied proudly. She was curious about a lot of things, how hard it’d be to actually learn how to do something from scratch, to have a skill of her own.

 

Well, that was just another goal to tack to her ever growing list of things to do. She was up for the challenge, all of them.

 

Doing was a sign of living and she wanted to leave such a sign. If only for herself.

 

“You like the romantic languages?” Hector quirked an eyebrow in interest.

 

“Well, it’s very... _romantic_ , and I can’t say I don’t like a good romance in my life.” She told him, batting her eyes flirtily.

 

“Aren’t we all looking for something? Love. Money. Freedom. Meaning.” Hector mused as he drained his drink.

 

She only giggled in response, the alcohol making its effects more pronounced after having finished her own.

Ah yes, this was the life.

 

Carefree conversations _with_ people, getting a glimpse into the lives of others while they so casually ask you about yours.

 

Extroberta could not have asked for more.

 

A simple glimpse at her watch quickly gave her another.

 

More time.

 

A reminder that she’d have to go back soon. Oh, how she longed to stay and not go. To not have to break from his blissful night.

 

“It’s been fun but I think I’ve got go.” She informed him sadly. Getting up to leave felt strangely heavy, a reluctance to break from the moment.

 

“You’re going already? Bu you just got here.” Hector asked faux pleadingly. “I’m just messing with ya, you’re right. It is getting a little late. It’s been fun, though.” He held out his hand for her to take.

 

She took his hand, giving it a nice friendly shake.

 

Extroberta paused for a moment.

“Hey, would you like to meet up again some other night? I enjoyed tonight.” She smiled hopefully at him. To think, he could maybe be her first friend out in the real world.

 

“Yeah, sure. What’s your number?”

  


As the bus left the dance hall and headed home, the world felt just a little colder. Extroberta had enjoyed her night out and she couldn’t say she wasn’t satisfied. It was the fact that it was ending instead. Everything came to an end eventually, but it’d felt like taking a great deep breath of fresh air for the first time in her life, only to return to a dusty cramped basement.

 

She knew she could always come out once again, she could even invite Hector too. She glanced down at the number in her hand, smiling to herself.

 

Time was ticking down slowly, twenty left to go home. Twenty minutes until she returned.

 

….

 

Twenty minutes until she could have this for good. The thought struck her again, but this time without the activity of life in the background distracting her from it.

 

Nineteen minutes until she could stay this way forever. She’d have to go back to living in Jung’s mind eventually…

 

Even if she wanted to stay she’d have to fight him for control wouldn’t he?

 

She couldn’t do that to him, not when she’d knew what she’d be condemning him to.

 

 _Could she?_ Floated up into her mind.

 

 _Extroberta, what are you doing?_ Introbert asked, stressing the question more this time.

 

 _It’s fine, Introbert, I’m going home._ She thought back to him hurriedly, pushing him away from her mentally. Pushing down on the little mental communication between them she stared out at the passing lights of cars coming from the other direction.

 

Ten minutes left and she stood at the door, home at last.

 

So much had happened in the past two hours it’d made her head spin. Now it was time to say goodbye.

 

Just for now.

 

As she changed out of her dress and stared at the mirror, looking at her face one last time she couldn’t have felt any more reluctant, any sadder.

 

She was only temporarily losing her freedom, right? She could always come back.

 

When would be the next time she could relish in living? How long would she have to count down the hours and days that stretched by for what felt like forever in the mindscape? To go back to being a ghostly being, a simple idea with a soul?

 

There had been a side effect, a trap waiting for her. One she couldn’t have foreseen. She’d never liked giving up control, her limited sense of self. Now that she’d had that taste, could she go back to living content with the little snippets of pseudo freedom Jung’s body could offer her when he did?

 

Extroberta had always known she was being suffocated by both the nature of her being, her personality and by the limitations Jung had for them, regardless of how intentional they may have been. Now that she’d taken a true, free breath, could she stand to go back?

 

Five minutes.

 

Tick tock.

 

She let go of the bathroom counter and demorphed, watching as she physically melted away, leaving Jung where she’d been just moments before. She took a step back and relinquished control.

 

She couldn’t do it to him. As much as she loved being real and loved having a physical body, he couldn’t rob him of his.

….

 

The mindscape had never seemed so empty now. Just her and Introbert.

 

Good old ‘Bert. He watched her with suspicion. It hurt but she knew it was deserved.

 

“Berta, what happened up there?” He asked, concern and annoyance finely mixed together.

 

She could only give him a tired, remorseful smile.

 

“It’s nothing, Bert. I just had a good time. That’s all.” She went to her ‘room’. It wasn’t really a room a place to call her own, but it was as private as she could get in here.

 

“ _Berta_.” He stressed, making a move to follow her.

 

“I’m fine, Bert. You don’t need to worry.”

And then she closed the ‘door’.


End file.
